I reflected on Lakeside’s graduations in my last post and they all did live up to their expectations of being very moving with inspirational stories of life transformation. Although graduations are significant accomplishments to be celebrated, we often find it to be an experience that can have some melancholy and difficult emotions.
There can be sadness, grief, loss of motivation and typical emotions of change for many students. Some of the contributing factors that create this uncertainty and low feelings are:
- Loss of a familiar routine and structure
- Separation from friends, classmates and school staff
- Fear and/or difficulty launching their next steps
- Pressure to meet personal or family expectations
- New questions about identity or purpose
- The achievement vacuum after completing their goals
Research about this emotional transition time is clear that it is quite common. Some of the emotions and symptoms include feeling emotionally numb, anxious about the future, loss of motivation, experiencing sleep problems, displaying social withdrawal, irritability and having a sense of disappointing comparisons to others about goals and achievements. These emotions are usually observed by family members and close friends and sometimes can be concerning since it is expected that this is a time of celebration. It is important to realize that this time is a major adjustment as life has been extremely planned for them for most of their lives. This newfound adaptation to adulthood is significant and should be normalized.
To help normalize this phase of life, it will be important to establish some different stabilizing routines. Here are some examples:
- Create a new daily routine with healthy experiences in sleep, eating and exercise
- Maintain regular connections with friends, classmates and family members
- Continue learning through new experiences, courses and training of interest
- Break larger career goals into attainable smaller achievements
- Limit social media that can create unrealistic comparisons to others
- Learn to regulate some of the new emotions
- Take some time to shadow individuals who are in jobs they are interested in
- Seek support from a counselor who will have the ability to help them find new life direction
Achieving a major life goal and getting a diploma is a life-changing moment that is a launch point for the next steps of life. It can be gratifying but also frightening. Recognizing that this is a major life transition with some challenging emotions should be considered quite normal as is any major change in life. As we help our graduates go through this transition and find new routines, purpose and next life goals, it will be important to validate the process, help them adapt and give them emotional and relational support so they can navigate this important life transition.
Gerry Vassar
President/CEO
